Black Vs. White Ninja: The Seen and Unseen

In this post, we will examine the strategic essence of the Ninja uniform. We will consider questions such as what color of a uniform to wear and when if ever, should a Ninja wear a white or red ninja outfit and under what circumstances? These questions will be examined with the basic premise that Ninja are the unseen and if seen are yet still unseen. But if any Ninja is seen then they could not possibly be a true Ninja…except of course in 80’s ninja films which we will look at in extreme mockery and much laughter.

We will consider these questions as we practice and master the art of Ninja spotting. If you will look at this first picture. Concentrate and when you are ready look below and seek out the NInja who are there if you dare.

Not sure huh? A little too tough on the eyes…yes, you must take care not to strain oneself in the beginning stages, many a neophyte Ninja spotter has died just from concentrating too strongly and for too long a time, for the Master of silence and stealth are devious in their unseeness–they seek to confuse, confound, and if possible contort the minds of those seeking to expose them in their subterfuge.

I know one of the tough things about Ninja spotting is your mind begins to see things. A common vision or illusion is the sight of two figures about 40 or 50 feet apart from one another running next to a lake…but those couldn’t be Ninja right? Ninja are the epitome of stealth and surprise, maybe they’re a mind-generated holographic image sent by the nastiest of Ninjas or possibly puppet-like play dummies with moving parts that look like real humans until you shoot them with an arrow or stick them with a throwing star, then their true shape comes into form and they are seen for what they really are–cheap imitation Ninja dummies stuffed with straw, hay, grass, maybe even a little weed to cause extra hallucinations if you tried to burn it, and all the while the real ninja are running nearby in the bushes, laughing at their puppetry and their mindless audience who buys this trickery of tricks hook line and sinker.

However, that’s only what these master Ninjas wanted you to think. Ha! That’s exactly what they were planning all along. They are practicing the art of being unseen, while yet being seen, however, because of their Ninja mastery and trickery, they are truly unseen though seen. How do I know they are masters? I know because they know that you know in advance that that is exactly what you would know and expect from NInjas, to use play-dummies and instead hide in the bushes, yet in their nefarious plan your ninja spotting attempts were foiled!

To help you overcome the Ninja mind trick, we’ve circled the black ninja with a black circle and we’ve circled the white ninja with a white circle. This is also for color coding their clothes to the circle and to make sure you hadn’t seen the white ninja where the black one was. Nor the black ninja where the white one was.

Sometimes when under the influence of a combination of weed from trying to burn the play dummies with the hay, straw and weed stuffed inside one may begin to hallucinate, that and the fact that these Ninja are really bad and may be playing tricks with your color coding mind abilities, even messing with your brain’s ability to differntiate colors. One of the reasons they do this is in a war, what if they could trick you to kill the Ninja that are fighting on your side? If they could get their enemy to kill their enemy, then they wouldn’t even have to fight…truly this is the art of fighting without fighting–confusing Ninja’s color codedness so that they assassinate their own clan. What an evil Ninja trick to do.

One must take extreme caution against the Ninja mind games that they play! One way of knowing they are doing this, is try looking at a Ninja clad in black, does he look white? If he does, then you know they’ve done it again. The only way to combat this is to close your eyes and blindfold yourself and then fight by Ninja intuition. Most true Ninja will have no problem performing this feat, although usually they do this only in movies and in training, what idiot would in a battle under normal circumstances blindfold himself? Only the most daring and masterful of Ninja assassins would attempt this without needing to do so. So beware!

Great, now try and locate a red Ninja who is sneaking up on the white one. Any ideas where he might possibly be?

Yes, this one also is very tough. Unfortunately the white ninja seems to not be paying attention to the great big reddish shadow he is casting upon the tree…you might think he’s quite an idiot for not being more careful in his shadow casting…doesn’t he know that shadows on trees can be seen for miles…doesn’t he know he’s completely visible now with this big shadow above him (not to mention the fact that he’s wearing complete white in a forest of green and dark shadows), it’s possible he was a little too preoccupied trying to get away from the nasty Ninja who were chasing him through the forest, even though they were all wearing red–a beacon for all true Master Ninjas of an easy find and thus easy kill!

Ha! That wasn’t the white Ninja’s shadow, that was merely the red Ninja doing the only thing possible that he could do with such a bright idiotic and quite flashy and fashionable Ninja outfit. He thought he could trick the White Ninja into believing that his shadow was behind him on the tree, but this red Ninja wasn’t thinking with a full melon, he should have considered the height of the tree and the height of the ninja plus the position of the sun and the direction of the wind. There is an intricate Ninja mathematical equation that is needed in order to perform this level of trickery, casting a false shadow in order to trick an opponent into thinking its really his own shadow. Sneaky, nasty Ninja! Yet that is why I circled him in green for his noviceness is evident by his inability to calculate such simple Ninja mathematics of shadow casting.

Although to all of you it seemed like the White Ninja’s shadow on the tree, the White Ninja is a master at Ninja mathematical equations at determining the true shadow and in no time flat he knew that the red shadow behind him just couldn’t possibly be his own.

However, the White Ninja shows no signs of this realization, but rather waits in cool and calm for the Red Ninja…er…wannabe Ninja to strike. And, making it even more obvious that this red Ninja needs to stop trying and start dying, he jumps out of the tree with a battle cry, flips in the air, and lands to meet his sudden and very unsurprising end at the hands of the White Ninja. What a waste of Ninja training–not sure what the deal was with the battle cry and all the flipping! Maybe he thought he could show his incredible Ninja abilities of flipping in mid-air (although I’ve never seen a Ninja not do this–it’s unfortunate that such an amazing stunt for the normal human being has been reduced to nothing but eye candy to those trained in the ways of Ninja) secondly, the battle cry may have been an attempt to make the White Ninja pee in his pants in fright, thus making him even more spot-able in the forest. Just think if you had to spot a White Ninja with big yellow stains running down the front, don’t you think it would be easier too? Of course, no one asked an even more fundamental question, how in the world does the White Ninja think he’s not visible either… In fact, let’s do one more training exercise where he is the main focus.

Let’s see if you can spot the White Ninja in this office photo?

Wow! He’s just too good. I think in this case, he did choose the right color, I mean, where is he? I mean, I guess our only assumption is that he must be blending in with either the elevator or the white wall. What mastery over his environment! How did he know he’d have such natural camoflauge in an office building?

Ninja truly are prepared for everything and all circumstances. BTW, he even used the elevator in this scene. Most Ninja would have either done some amazing flips and landed above or scaled the walls with their spiked gloves on, but this guy knows how to conserve his energy for the big scuffle ahead. Only a grand master, completely comfortable in his skills of Ninjutsu would leisurely take an elevator knowing that he has nothing to prove, his skills of death will prove themselves, they are the epitome of proof without needing proof, so much proof that riding an elevator shows his wild and unquestioning ability to flaunt without his prowess and fearless abandon without any effort whatsoever. He is truly the most dangerous and cunning.

Well, to help you out in spotting this White fairy-like creature of death and mayhem, I’ve highlighted him in white because he is White, meaning he’s wearing white and he’s Caucasian. Nice combo eh? I’m sure the writers and producers meant nothing by this association…or did they? BTW, he’s so smug, he even has the audacity to be winking at you, knowing you can’t see the unseen. What clever poise and yet mocking amusement as he gives you a wink and a nod before he heads to his battle against the forces of evil. He makes you smile and like him, before he kills you in the head with a throwing star! Don’t trust even a white ninja…!

Honestly, here I have to say one more thing. Although in this photo it’s obvious he’s chosen a good place for cover, what if someone comes out of their office and sees him? Aren’t they going to know he’s a Ninja–him in this white uniform, white mask and all these white swords and a bow and arrows? I don’t think they’re going to not see him then are they? Wouldn’t it even be better to not wear the Ninja uniform and instead dress like an office worker or a custodian or even an over-sized rodent might be better…

BTW, doesn’t it astound you the level of detail to this Ninja’s whiteness–I mean white sword handles, white scabbards, a white bow and arrow…what scrutiny to details, what finesse in considering all possible equipment, what color coded anality that smacks of…anality…and brilliance. Who would not mess in their pants at seeing this agent of death?

Oops…this would be one of those examples of getting caught without a good explanation…what if he had been dressed as a mailman or an office temp or even a pizza delivery boy or back to what I originally had said about the element of surprise. What if he had painted a clown face under his hood and as soon as he was spotted he quickly took off his mask and started dancing around the office like a clown. Don’t you think he could have thrown the woman off her balance and at least she wouldn’t be sure if a Ninja was in the office. I mean, he looks like a Ninja from the shoulders down, but what agent of assassination would look like a clown. I think it would buy him just enough time to smoke bomb her back into her office and him on to the rest of the mission. Dumb Ninja!

~ by najashi on June 7, 2008.