Ninja in the Media: Disinformation
Can you spot him? This takes training in specialized ninja spotting techniques. They walk among us, disguised, deadly, and ready to strike. Also, can you count how many racist stereotypes they can put in one picture? The 80′s isn’t that much different than today, eh?
And just one more word about ninjas…I’m thinking about writing a book on how ninjas are treated in the media as part of a conspiracy to hide the fact that they are actually everywhere among us. Unsolved crime, unsolved killings, people just disappearing, I’ll bet you those ninjas are behind it and I’ll bet you part of their plan is to make really stupid ninja movies that make ninjas look really visible and disgustingly idotic when fighting good guys so that the real good guys will let down their guard and not believe that ninjas are really as good as they say they are. One place to find ninjas is old 80′s movies–ask yourself not who the actors are–those are the underlings! It’s the director or producer who really is the master ninja! They know what’s really going on!
Those recent shark attacks off of Mexico and San Diego Coast…you can bet those ninjas did it and made it look like a shark, they may even have a shark outfit they wear just to fool the lifeguards…no wonder they couldn’t find the shark after the attack…it’s because there was no shark. Those ninjas are getting sneakier and sneakier.
So be careful at the gym, you never know when you might be training next to an old granny or some chunky businessman in his 40′s, well just be on the look out for weird scars, occasional limping or maybe they just disappear all of the sudden–they may have battle wounds or they may be targeting someone in your gym and such, they might really be a ninja who is throwing you off with their chunkiness, but in reality he is as invisible as he can be, but he is deadly at his art.
Couldn’t you just see one of them grabbing the latpulls chain and using it as some sort of nunchaku weapon? Or taking a 2 1/2 pound or 5 pound weight and chucking it like a throwing star–sizzling through the air in perfect spinning succession, and mercilessly clunking someone in the head with it KAPLONK! and knocking them out dead! What amazing simplicity and yet deadly with seemingly innocuous objects. Start filing down all your kitchen items just to be safe!
Just be on the lookout, I’m sure there are ninjas training in your gym–where else would they train–a secret hideout in the middle of the desert? Hah! That’s what the movies want to make you think! They want you to think that they are secluding themselves when they train–going to some octagonal training facility made out of bamboo in the middle of the Mohave desert, wearing their suits in broad daylight and taking out the occasional cow or camper who happens to wander into their midst, but no!
They are smarter than that–they don’t have to don their black suits–they know the art of invisibility–it’s almost like they are wearing their black suit–it’s just on under their underpants and t-shirt…who knows the mind of a ninja?
Or they may be swimming in your pool, training for the NEXT shark attack! Oh yea, they may not be wearing the shark suit in broad daylight where everyone can see them, but watch HOW they swim. Are they swerving back and forth under the water? If you were to glue a fin on their back would it look like the Jaws movie? Do they sneak up and scare people in the water as if they were coming up from UNDERNEATH them to suck them down to a watery grave?
If you can answer in the affirmative, then you my friend have just spotted one of the deadly assasins. But be careful, they usually know that you know even before you actually know, that’s just how good they are at knowing.
Lastly, just pay attention to people who seem most unlikely to be a ninja–they are usually the most likely to be ninja…unless a ninja is trying to outsmart another ninja…then he may know ninja are looking for the most unlikely person to be a ninja and so he may try to act like a ninja to throw the real ninja off his tracks…I think this happens sometimes, so trust no one–the people acting like ninjas and the most unlikely people to be ninjas–these are your surest bets.
Of course the most sneaky ninja would know that that is who you’d look for, so they seek to deceive even the most wise.
These guys or girls or turtles don’t act like ninjas nor do they act like the most unlikely to be ninja type personalities, these guys actually try to fit in between those two extremes…so pretty much don’t trust anybody. Okay?
Actually, the best way to fight these ninjas is just to become one yourself…alright, that’s all i have to say on this subject at the present time, maybe I’ll start a beware of ninja blog…wouldn’t that be funny? Of course, until I get killed from exposing their darkest secrets!
Let’s see how you did on your second Ninja spotting exercise, you’ll see this Ninja outlined in black, because that’s what color he’ll turn after being killed, dead, and buried for getting caught out in the open like a sucka!
